Monday, May 7, 2012

Choosing What I Want Most over What I Want in the Moment




“My biggest failure in life is trading what I want the most for what I want at the moment…”  written on the back of a quote note that an old timer gave me in the noon meeting today 

I didn’t have the chance to stop Rita and thank her again for gifting me with this quote.  I say “again” because this same old timer with about a million years of  sobriety gave me a card with the same quote on it a few years back during another period of sobriety.  I carried that card in my wallet and found it helpful at the most perfect times along my journey.  I even pulled it out at treatment and shared it with a small group.  The fact is that I had carried it throughout my relapse because it makes so much sense to me.  I get it that there are those who need to take more risks in life and learn to soak up the moment for what it is and not be so controlled by the ir plans but for this alcoholic I have a large enough dose of that in my inherent nature and I think….no, I know… that there are countless times when I threw away my progress toward something I wanted in the long run for what I wanted in the moment.  Sometimes it wasn’t even about what I wanted in a moment but a matter of chosing anger in a moment verses peace in the long run or chosing to want to eat a chocolate bar and sit on the couch in the moment verses my long term goal of physical, emotional, metnal and spiritual health and fitness.  I also get it too that we as alcoholics are learning to nurture and care for ourselves with some tenderness after abusing ourselves for so long but something I often ask myself now is “am I chosing what I want in this moment over what I really want most.”  Brothers and Sister s I invite you to join me in taking Rita’s quote and seeing if it can’t be the platform to launch ourselves to our next level of greatness.  Take a breath and breathe that in for a moment.



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