Exploring My Creativity

When I am too attached to the outcome I can’t possibly let life flow with the sheer loving power and intelligence that it would without my arms wrapped so tightly around it with my plan.  Here in lies my exploration of my creativity?  I was asked the other day, what kind of speaker are you, extemporaneous(a word I had to look up which means with little or no preparation) or planned?  This is a question I have been exploring over the year and have adamantly identified myself as indeed an extemparneous type but in the past week and with a revelation in my morning meditation I think I might just be a little bit of both.  I am finding that creativity moves from the heart AND it has intelligence, clarity and power when it is expressed in a structure.  As someone who’s primary drive in life is dedicated to discovering and unleashing the creativity at the center of my soul, you bet it’s my business to be in the inquiry of the quality and nature of creativity.  What I mean by this is that with my recent exploration of creativity I am finding myself abandoning such one sidedness with the idea that it’s only those who spontaneously unleash from the heart that win my respect of their creativity.  It is true that creativity is and must be unleashed from the heart but I think it can be supported, magnified and gain clarity and therefore power if there is some structure provided for it’s flow.  Now I am seeing more broadly as I begin to understand that there can be a loose plan or structure, a framework for the creativity to flow.  Without any real attachment, I have a desire that my creativity be a gift to those around me.  I have a true desire to express myself beautifully, lovingly and impactfully.  So, I study those who express their soul’s gift beautifully, lovingly and impactfully.  What I am noticing is that a.) the language of the creator is always of the heart and b.) that some creators are best expressed through a framework of mild preparation.  Mediocrity for me is doing less than my best.  It is opening the nozzle of my creativity only partially and leaving knowing that I could have opened it up all the way.  Simply in that knowing I feel the presence of mediocrity.  I am again breaking my agreements with mediocrity and tapping my creativity with the intention to open the nozzle all the way, which is why for now I will also prepare a strong framework for my creativity to flow.  If you are wondering where this is all coming from I will tell you that recently I had two opportunities to be creative in healing forums.  First, I chaired a giant meeting and second, I led a meditation at church.  In both cases I left with the feeling that I had re-engaged my agreements with mediocrity.  In both cases I did little to prepare.  Because my life is the tapestry of my creativity and there is no other higher aspiration than for my creativity to be lovingly unleashed, these two instances are rich opportunities for my growth.  I could just let them go or I can pay attention to the “bummer” feeling that I felt and recognize that it is pointing to an area of my growth.  I am sober to tap into my greatness, to recognize your greatness and to participate in this world in profound and powerful ways.  The most powerful way to participate in life, in my eyes, is to be the most authentically creative expression of love that I can be.  Dedicate yourself to this with me.